Commitment

As some of you know, I'm currently participating in Semperviva's 40 Day Yoga Challenge. This past week has so far been the most challenging for me.

I call this the "Tipping Tree" pose. Also, notice how happy I look here.
This was NOT taken  after Wednesday's class.

On Monday I eased into my weekly practice with a very slow paced Hatha class, first thing in the morning. I felt all zen, and thought to myself, "Man, this daily yoga thing isn't so bad!" So on Tuesday I ramped it up a bit and found myself frantically panting as beads of sweat trickled down my spine during a muscle-burning Vinyasa Power Flow class. (Panting is not so zen.) Naturally, the trainer in me thought, "Now this is what I'm talking about!" Needless to say, come Wednesday my body was feeling achy. Not sore, just... fatigued. Due to my busy schedule, the only class that worked for me that day was another Vinyasa Power Flow. I reluctantly slipped into my lulu's, pulled my hair up, and headed over to the studio.

As soon as I stepped foot on the mat, and lined up my bones to sit in a poker-straight cross-legged position, I realized my body was begging for a day off. But it wasn't my body that was giving me grief. It was my mind. My muscles had a lot of strength. I managed to get into poses I have never been able to get in to. My thoughts didn't match my physical strength. Instead of focusing on breath, on the movement, I was criticizing the teacher, thinking how if she tells me to be 'present' one more time, I will actually get up and leave the class. (Of course, I didn't!) The thing is, she was actually a great teacher! She gave good cues, she challenged everyone's level of ability, and was very positive. When savasana was over I felt great, but I still bolted out of the studio faster than you could say 'namaste'.

By Thursday I was beat! My sleep the night prior was interrupted thanks the the high pitched shrill of some girl who was overly excited about seeing her friend (at 2:00 AM). I got up at 5:00 am to train my first client. I taught a lunch time class (and took part in it as well), and by 3:45 pm I was slugging my way to the studio for a 4:00 pm Hatha class. Luckily it was one of those very slow paced classes that focuses mainly on breathing and meditation. I got through it by literally focusing on one single breath at a time. That night I slept like a rock.

This morning I woke up fairly rested. Still quite tired, but my body felt rejuvenated. I made it to a 7:00 am class that was the perfect combination of flow-y and breath-focus-y.

So why didn't I take a day off mid week? What drove me to practice even on those days I felt like I was going to cry if I had to make my way into another downward dog? It's because of what one teacher told me on the very first day of this yoga challenge:

"Honor your commitments. Always honor what you say you will do for yourself. If you don't honor the commitments you make to yourself, how can you expect anyone to honor the commitments they make to you?"

It was at that moment that a light went off. Since that day, every morning I wake up thinking "honor your commitment". Every time I'm dreading going to yoga because I'm feeling lazy, tired, distracted, I think "honor your commitment". I realize now that achieving your goals means staying true to your words, especially on those days you regret creating those goals in the first place. I've spent this week honoring my commitment to my practice.

Have you been honoring the commitments you've made to yourself?